"Feeling a Little Mortal"

"The days of his youth hast thou shortened: thou hast covered him with shame. Selah." (Psalms 89:45)
I can only hope by now that we get the picture, because by this point and time, life is about all that is left. If anything else mattered at all, this matters the most: What happens when I die? What will they say about me when I am gone? Will my life have mattered? You could look at this in several ways; or you could just choose to ignore it altogether, which is what the majority of the world will do. 'What a waste of good talent,' they might say, 'What a waste of time.' If they say that about me, then they will be totally mistaken. Sure, I might drag on a little about certain things, and I might even push the edge of reason; but there is nothing that compares to the days when there is a sweet connection with God. It might not be every day, but it sure is most; and as far as I am concerned, that is never a waste of my time! As I was looking up the word "shame," there was really hardly anything to see, but 'shame.' There was nothing else; with the exception of the fact that this word is a feminine noun. As I tried to look up what that meant, it surprised me that the definition was attributed to a woman, girl, or a female animal; but when I looked it up in my Bible, the definition said that it did not necessarily relate to sex; instead it seemed to relate to something that is used up, if that makes any sense what so ever. The example given for a feminine noun was, "the feast," while an example for a masculine noun was, "temple." Go figure! I am not really sure what that is trying to say to me, except that 'it is what it is' and there is nothing I can really do about it. My, how I love to spend time with the Lord. I am never not surprised by how He ministers into my heart! When I was a teenager I thought that I would not live past thirty, so I lived my life as if I needed to get all I could get; all the drugs, the girls, the parties; anything that could bring excitement and pleasure into my life, I thought I needed to get it while I could, because my life would be short. I remember nights that I thought, this could be the night, as I laid there in bed with my arms crossed upon my chest; after having taken more drugs than I probably should have, it was a miracle that it really didn't happen. There is something special that we have, more special than we can even express in words. It's called "eternal life," and it crosses all the bonds of this life; in other words, nothing can hold onto you, and you will hold onto nothing...
"Since you have been raised to new life with Christ, set your sights on the realities of heaven, where Christ sits in the place of honor at God's right hand. Think about the things of heaven, not the things of earth. For you died to this life, and your real life is hidden with Christ in God. And when Christ, who is your life is revealed to the whole world, you will share in all his glory." (Colossians 3:1-4) NLT